en
** fourtune teller **
by intrepid star-gazer (or just generally confused daydreaming bloke) Pete Gumbrell
These star signs were first published in late 2003.
So, what gimmick have I employed this time? What silly quirk has been applied to this season's star signs? Well, actually, nothing much at all, except that for the first time ever these predictions are just plain sensible, or maybe just plain. It was less work for me. This is readers' reward for constantly moaning that they don't like my star signs. So, if you like them boring, you've got them boring. Happy Xmas from the grumpy git webmaster!
| ARIES The festive period is never your happiest hour, and this year's events send you into a spiral of despair. Take comfort in your Renault 4, which will act as your one reliable source of escape from all things Santa Claus. Planetary alignments in your fifth house of love will force distant partners closer than ever before, and will create fireworks around the first new moon of the new year. | TAURUS A Spanish associate will influence your decision-making greatly around the winter solstice, and you will have to battle hard to get your own way and ensure that events run smoothly. A trip to the doctors will pay dividends if you make the journey in a Renault 4, and the car will bring another pleasant surprise to your door in midwinter. The number 7 and the colour green hold extraordinary power over your abilities this Christmas. |
| GEMINI Whilst driving your R4, keep your eyes peeled for unusual objects at the roadside, which may hold the key to your success in 2004. A friend from many years past will make a reappearance, to the displeasure of somebody in your family. Continue with current projects, and don't let anybody stand in the way of your ambitions. Destiny rings a doorbell with a number 9. | CANCER A new arrival forces a change of circumstances in your domestic life, whilst the conjunction of Mercury and Neptune creates havoc in your work environment. Christmas festivities will only delay the inevitable for a short while, and you must boldly face the facts in the new year. Use your Renault 4 as an invaluable tool in swaying the opinions of those ranked against you. |
| LEO On a fine winter's day you discover something that will make your stomach churn, but all is not what it seems. Further investigation will reveal a once-in-a-lifetime surprise opportunity and you should seize it before somebody else does. Magnetic activity in the final flings of the year will bring pain and pleasure in small portions, but a Renault 4 will hold the cure and offer a clue to future rewards. | VIRGO This winter will be motoring mayhem for you and your Renault 4, but friends and enemies will divert your attention from the car and keep you locked up throughout much of the season pursuing other affairs. Take respite with some long, stress-relieving walks, and a secret will unravel as you stride. A pink washroom will be the scene of an encounter with somebody you have been avoiding for too long. |
| LIBRA A festival or private party will allow you to unwind after a hectic set of events around the new year. Make the most of it, since the pace only quickens through the winter and culminates in a stand-off between two opposite quarters on a misty February morning. Your Renault 4 will suffer a small scar as a result, but you will come through a stronger person, and the car becomes your symbol of strength in the days that follow. | SCORPIO The bane of a Scorpio's life, Mars, is up to its usual tricks this Christmas. Keep your head above the water - at one point literally - if you want to catch some important R4-related information and escape the worst that the season has to bring. Destiny keeps you near a close companion in the most telling spell of your relationship, but always maintain a healthy distance or you'll be regretting it in years to come. |
| SAGITTARIUS Too much chocolate could be the cause of a sick and sorry period after Christmas, but the purging this brings about will empty the demons within and set you in good stead for the new year. Be careful of words of advice offered by the unqualified, and ensure your Renault 4 is well looked after until the worst of the winter is over. Solar activity in the darkest days will inspire you to pursue evil things; be cautious. | CAPRICORN A rodent will spread nasty vibes around your home just after festivities have ceased and all has been prematurely hailed a success. You must act fast to patch up the problems this creates, else years of hard work could be undone. The constellation of Galileo will unleash damage on your greatest foes, so use this help to your best advantage. Destiny shines light upon a Renault 4 on a cold night. |
| AQUARIUS A princess from your childhood will be inspirational in spreading waves of happiness this winter. Try to appreciate the positive side of the festive season, and your natural glow will rub off on others around you. This radiance will bring emotional rewards later in the year. A green feature in your home will hold an unpleasant but eventually fortuitous, sweet surprise. Keep your Renault 4 away from public officials, or face the consequences. | PISCES In the final flings of the festive weeks, your Renault 4 disappoints you with failure at an inopportune time. It may seem a drudge, but a little bit of effort will go a long way and ensure a trouble free season ahead. An overly complex situation in your house of finance needs resolving, and relationships will be improved dramatically when this is achieved. A rose and a cream card will be the backdrop for romance. |
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